Psychologists distinguish aggressive, passive and assertive behavior. What are their principles and characteristics and which one is better?
Aggression and passivity
The activity of a passive person is limitedframework that does not allow for any initiative. It's the perfect performer who acts on a team and never chooses on his own, and it's usually not heard or seen. A person who adheres to an aggressive manner of behavior, on the contrary, is always in sight and in the center of events, that is scandals. Accusing, insulting and intimidating, he persistently achieves his goals - satisfies his ambitions or simply causes moral damage to people who are not welcome to him.
Manipulative types of behavior
The aggressor may seem very active, butthere is one caveat. Like a passive person, he never answers: he only actively accuses others of his problems. So, this is an explicit manipulator. Passivity is also fraught with manipulation, because in the misfortunes of one who does not decide anything himself, someone else is always to blame.
Assertive behavior
Aggression and passivity are two seemingopposites, but in fact - the same phenomenon. But people do not always manipulate themselves like that. When they behave naturally, do not depend on external evaluations and influences, act openly and are responsible for their actions, this assertive behavior. Its name comes from the English verb assert - assert, assert its rights.
Basic principles
Responsibility that an assertive personrecognizes for himself. He acts on his own, and also understands that he has no right to blame other people for how he reacts to their behavior.
Self-esteem and respect for others. These two things are directly interrelated: a man who does not respect himself, will not be respected by other people.
Effective communication.It is determined by three qualities: truthfulness, openness and sincerity in expressing one's opinion, feelings and thoughts on any issue. Straightness, however, has reasonable limits: do not touch, upset or insult the interlocutor.
Self-confidence. It is based on the already mentioned self-esteem, as well as on the knowledge of one's own merits, professional qualities and skills.
The desire to listen and understand the opponent.Assertive behavior means that a person can listen and try to understand someone else's point of view, and also recognizes its right to exist, even if it is different from his own.
Negotiations and compromises.This point follows from the previous one: although opinions on some issue may differ, it is necessary to agree in order to live or work together was comfortable, and it is necessary to take into account the interests of each of the involved parties.
Find simple answers to complex questions.Manipulators, both passive and aggressive, like to entangle everything and cast a shadow on the wattle fence. In contrast, a person acting assertively does not complicate matters where possible.
